Tuesday, 07 July 2009

• How to get past a womans defences...

      Here's an interesting story...
  
      A few hours ago I was standing in a  bar
  in Rockingham. I was standing near to the bar, looking around
  at the people, when the guy next to me starts
  talking to a girl he doesn't know. She turned and looked at him with a look that
  said "I don't know you, I don't want to talk to you, and you have no chance with me."
  The look on her face couldn't have been more clear. As soon as he started talking to her, she
  put up her defenses.
  
  The more he tried to talk to her, the more
  annoyed she got.
  
  It was painful to watch.
  Then things got REALLY interesting.
  
  The guy turned to me and started making
  conversation with me.
  
      He asked me how I was "doing" with the ladies
  at the bar. I told him that I had just arrived, and I
  wasn't particularly in the mood to talk to women
  at the moment... I was just enjoying my drink and
  relaxing.
  
  He then started to talk about how "meeting
  women was a numbers game" and how he had been
  "hitting" on women all night... but he didn't
  have any "luck" so far.
  
      We started discussing our different approaches
  to meeting women.
  
      I told him that when I decide to talk to a
  woman that I really find attractive, I am
  confident that I'll be successful with her.
  
      He kind of laughed and told me that meeting
  women was a game of luck, and if you wanted to
  win, you had to just keep playing the numbers...
  and hope you find one who likes you.
  
      Right at that moment, two cute women walked up
  to the bar. One of them was very hot. He
  looked at the hotter girl, pointed to her, and
  said "I like that."
  
      I said "Well, then go talk to her."
  
      He decided to go "order a drink" (in other
  words, he was going to go up to the bar and FAKE
  like he was there to order a drink, and then
  "accidentally" start a conversation with her).
  
      Of course, he already HAD a drink, so he
  fumbled around trying to find a place to put it
  down so he could walk up to the bar with no drink
  and not look like he was "on the make."
  
      It was pretty damn funny.
  
      Anyway, he squeezes in next to this girl, and
  tries to act like he's just there to get a drink.
  He then turns to her, and tries to start a
  conversation.
  
      What happened? Of course...
  
      Her defenses went up INSTANTLY.
  
      She said a few words to him, but then turned
  away from him, took her drink and her friend, and
  walked away from the bar.
  
      He came back over to me and made no comment
  about the interaction with her...
  
      I watched him try to talk to more women after
  that... all with the same result.
  
      Their defenses went up AS SOON as he started
  talking to them.
  
      This guy's theory of "talking to a lot of women
  until you get lucky and find one who likes you"
  was working pretty well...
  
      Except for the fact that he WASN'T getting
  "lucky" at all, and NO women liked him....
  
      One of the problems he had was not
  understanding this thing called "Sexual
  Communication."
  
  
  HITTING THE WALL
  
      Have you ever been in a situation talking to a
  girl, and you could just FEEL that she had her
  "defenses up"?
  
      Or have you ever been out on a date with a
  woman, and had a bad feeling in your GUT about the
  situation... and no matter what you did, the
  situation only got worse, and she seemed to get
  further away from you?
  
      If you're like me, then you've been in a LOT of
  these situations.
  
      In fact, I think it's happened to me so many
  times that I have "female defense radar." It's
  like I can tell INSTANTLY if a woman has her
  defenses up... and it doesn't feel GOOD.
  
      You've been there... one minute everything is
  OK, and the next minute she has flipped on some
  kind of force-field that is PERMANENT.
  
      You know what I'm talking about...
  
      And once the defenses are up, it's as if she
  has become a DIFFERENT person. And trying to make
  it better, only makes it worse.
  
      Always.
  
      That's called HITTING THE WALL.
  
      And once you hit it, there's no bouncing back.
  
  
  A WOMAN'S DEFENSES, AND HOW THEY WORK
  
      So what's up with that?
  
      Why do women have this "defense mechanism"?
  
      What triggers it?
  
      And how can we, as guys, get past it?
  
      Well, the reality is that a woman's defense
  mechanism is something that PROTECTS her. It saves
  her time. And it saves her headaches and hassles.
  
      You've heard me say that attractive women are
  approached ALL THE TIME by men. In one way or
  another, an attractive woman is CONSTANTLY
  approached and pursued by men.
  
      Women can't afford to spend even a FRACTION of
  their time with every guy who shows interest, so
  they use "time management" techniques.
  
      How 21st-century of them.
  
      One of these "time management techniques" is
  their defense mechanism.
  
      If a girl decides that she isn't interested in
  being with a particular guy... and it doesn't
  matter if it's within the first five seconds or
  the first five months... the mechanism kicks in.
  
      It creates an invisible wall that protects her.
  You can feel it. She can feel it. And even though
  neither of you can see it, you both know that it's
  more powerful than a real wall... because most men
  don't know how to get PAST it.
  
      I know that you've thought about this issue at
  some point. If you're like me, you've thought
  about it a LOT. Maybe even obsessively. Maybe you
  have even schemed and tortured yourself trying to
  figure out the magic way to get past a woman's
  defenses...
  
      Are you with me here?
  
  
  A NEW WAY OF LOOKING AT THINGS...
  
      What if I were to tell you that YOU are the one
  who actually controls her defense mechanism?
  
      And what if I were to tell you that all this
  time, YOU'RE THE ONE who's been causing women to
  put up their defenses, and shut you out?
  
      And what if I told you that looking for the
  magic way to "get past her defenses" was really a
  waste of time?
  
      What if I told you instead that the ULTIMATE
  way to "get past" her defenses was to NEVER CAUSE
  HER TO PUT THEM UP in the first place.
  
      See, the reality is that her defenses are a
  RESPONSE or a REACTION to something YOU are doing.
  YOU are the one who's doing things that kick off
  the sequence of events.
  
      In fact, if you think of it from this
  particular perspective, you'll realize that you
  REALLY ARE controlling her defense mechanisms.
  
  
  BACK TO MY STORY...
  
      Shortly after his "bad luck" episodes, the guy
  I was talking to in the bar walked away from me.
  
      I stood at the bar thinking of what he had just
  said and done... and how so many guys I've met
  think the same way.
  
      Right then, a woman asked me if I'd move over a
  little bit so she could order a drink.
  
      I said "sure", and turned sideways so she could
  squeeze in next to me.
  
      At first, I turned my back to her.
  
      After a minute or two, I turned back around,
  and started talking to her and her friends.
  
      I was teasing them and making fun, and
  generally being a pain in the ass.
  
      There were a total of four girls there
  together, and I was talking to three of them.
  
      I turned my attention to the quietest of the
  three, and started teasing her.
  
      I asked her why she was so quiet, teasing her
  about it, etc.
  
      Every time I asked her a question or said
  something, she either shook her head "no" or
  nodded her head "yes."
  
      No words.
  
      Finally, she held up her left hand and proudly
  displayed her wedding ring.
  
      She said "I'm married."
  
      I laughed at her and said "Wow, good for you. I
  guess if I was trying to pick up on you I'd be
  pretty upset right now... but I'm not, so you
  don't have anything to worry about."
  
      Now, the REALITY of the situation was that I
  was NOT trying to "pick her up."
  
      She was the least attractive woman in the
  group, and her personality was about as
  interesting as a Cristiano Ronaldo's.
  
      Her friends heard me say this to her, and they
  turned and looked at me with wide eyes.
  
      They couldn't believe that I had just said that
  to their friend, and they could tell that I was
  being VERY serious, and that I couldn't care less
  what she thought of me.
  
      I went on talking to these four girls for the
  rest of the night... about another hour or so.
  
      I mixed up the conversation.
  
      Sometimes I talked to one of them... sometimes
  two... sometimes three... sometimes all four.
  
      I teased them all, took the piss, called them
  all kinds of freaky-chick names, and generally
  acted like they were my four, bratty little
  sisters who annoyed me... but who I still loved (a
  little).
  
      By the end of the evening, I was sitting on a
  little couch with three of the girls.
  
      At this point, there were almost NO women left
  at this bar. I'd say the guy/girl ratio was about
  6 or 7 to 1.
  
      I could see about 30 guys standing around me,
  and maybe 5 or 6 women. And I had 3 of those 5 or
  6 on the couch next to me.
  
      At one point, two of them were on either side
  of me MASSAGING me at the same time. It was funny.
  
      Of course RIGHT AT THAT MOMENT the guy from
  earlier walked by, stopped, and looked at me. The
  look of shock in his eyes was priceless. He didn't
  even say hi... he just walked away.
  
      The evening ended with two of the girls kissing
  me, and one of them getting my number because she
  was going to be in my area in a few weeks and
  wanted to see me...
  
      Let's get down to the point...
  
      The reason why I was so successful with these
  particular women was because I didn't do what
  every other guy that they ran into did...
  
      I didn't trigger their DEFENSE MECHANISMS.
  
      They had time to get to know me... they had
  time to get comfortable with me... and I had
  time to spark all kinds of sexual tension and
  attraction with them.
  
      Now let me tell you how I did it...
  
  
  WHAT TRIGGERS A WOMAN'S DEFENSE MECHANISM... AND
  HOW TO AVOID IT
  
      I'm about to give you a VERY important insight
  into how women interact with men.
  
      Pay close attention to this. It's taken me a
  LONG time to figure this out...
  
      Women are VERY perceptive.
  
      They know what a guy is thinking by looking at
  his body language, and listening to his voice
  tone.
  
      Some experts estimate that women are as much as
  TEN TIMES better than men at reading body
  language.
  
      To most women, men are an OPEN BOOK.
  
      Guys have no idea just how obvious they are...
  
      And there's one particular thing that triggers
  a woman's defense mechanism faster than a chubby
  kid eats cake...
  
      It's SEEKING APPROVAL.
  
      In every situation with a woman, you can say
  WHATEVER you want to say in a way that either:
  
  1) Seeks her approval
  
  2) Doesn't seek her approval
  
      Think about it.
  
      You're either SEEKING APPROVAL... or you're
  NOT...
  
      And most guys ARE when they're talking to a
  woman that they're interested in.
  
      As I watched the guy in the bar walk up to
  women and try to start conversations all night,
  the ONE thing that was obvious to all who had the
  eyes to see, was that he wanted APPROVAL.
  
      He wanted the women to LIKE him.
  
      I guarantee you that this man was an honest-
  to-goodness certifiable SOOK... and every woman
  that he tried to talk to could SMELL it on him.
  
      On the other hand, when I talk to a woman, I
  avoid seeking approval.
  
      I make it clear, no matter what I'm saying or
  doing, that it doesn't matter whether or not she
  likes me... I couldn't care less.
  
      The more I made it clear to the women I was
  talking to, that I DIDN'T need their approval, the
  more they LIKED ME.
  
      If you want to get past a woman's defenses, the
  best plan of action is to NOT TRIGGER them IN THE
  FIRST PLACE.
  
      Now, the reality of this situation is that some
  women are walking around with their defenses
  already up. Maybe they're married, or maybe
  they're angry at men... or maybe they're just very
  shy.
  
      We live in the real world, and this is part of
  it.
  
      But in most situations YOU are the one who
  triggers the defenses. It's YOU.
  
      I have several friends who I've watched
  interacting with women MANY, MANY times... and
  these particular guys RARELY, if EVER get the
  "defensive" cold shoulder from women.
  
      Why?
  
      Because they're not seeking approval. They're
  just doing what they want, and being themselves.
  
      If you can spend an hour talking to a woman,
  and not seek her approval the entire time, you
  stand a DRAMATICALLY better chance of taking
  things to the next level with her.
  
      That simple demonstration of showing her a full
  hour of non-approval-seeking behavior and
  communication will separate you from 99% of all
  the guys that have approached her in her life.
  
      And the best part about this particular
  technique is that it's NOT MANIPULATION. In fact,
  seeking approval is far more manipulative than
  what I'm saying here.
  
      In fact, one of the reasons why women don't
  like a guy who seek approval, is because they
  INSTANTLY sense that the guy is using a
  MANIPULATIVE tactic.
  
      If you think through the situations that you've
  been in with women, you realize that this is the
  case.
  
      So stop seeking women's approval when you meet
  them.
  
      Stop it!
  
      Learn how to say things in a way that clearly
  communicates that you don't need her to like you
  or approve of you.
  
      Then learn how to be Cocky & Funny.
  
      When you can make a woman laugh while you're
  NOT seeking her approval, you have a powerful
  combination that sparks ATTRACTION.
  
      Which leads me to the VERY BEST way of all to
  "get past a woman's defenses."
  
  
      MAKE HER FEEL ATTRACTION FOR YOU.
  
      If a woman feels a powerful ATTRACTION for you,
  then the kinds of defenses that we're talking
  about here don't even come into play.
  
      Attraction is such a powerful physical and
  emotional response that it temporarily disables a
  woman's defense mechanisms...
  
      It's the one thing, if you know how to do it,
  that women WISH you would trigger inside of them.
  
      Once a woman starts to feel that magical
  emotional and physical response called ATTRACTION,
  the entire situation changes, and you start having
  the kinds of success with women that most men only
  dream about.
  
      And most women go through life WISHING, HOPING,
  AND DREAMING that they will someday find a man
  that can make them feel this amazing feeling...
  
      That man should be you.

  Laterz

  Irish

   

  • 1:45 AM
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